It didn’t hit her until Howard had left for the plane home.
They all had plane tickets. Round trip, arranged by their parents back when they came here.
She hadn’t come by airplane. The closest her father had come to being involved in her coming here was trying to keep her away from this place — something she ought to thank him for at some point.
Some students had headed out to the village area; she wandered out there to see what was going on, only to see Wyatt getting into a car. Continue reading
Tuesday, June 5, 2001
Cya sat quietly in her room, on a cushion on the floor between her two chests, her fingers working slowly on a tiny rainbow sweater without consulting her mind.
It had been two weeks. She didn’t get faint anymore when she stood up. Dr. Caitrin said she was nearly recovered.
Nearly recovered. She hadn’t even known there was anything wrong with her. Nearly recovered. And now she struggled against this sick feeling in her stomach every time she thought about Dysmas. Continue reading
Monday, May 14, 2001
The air seemed lighter in the suite.
Cya had felt the ghost leave – they all had, she thought. The thing had sighed out of their lives with a remember and a sort of smug, self-satisfied feeling that it didn’t really seem like she’d earned.
Zita was safe with Sheba and seemed happy. Howard might not like the collar (what collar? All he had was a flower in his hat) but he and Magnolia were happy together. Leo was – well, Leo was almost Leo again, and he was doing pretty well with Aviv.
All the major problems of the year had been solved. It looked like even Lily had gotten rescued by an irate Arnbjörg and a very amused Jaya. Cya had seen the aftermath – Rand spewing blood from his nose and sputtering as he was escorted to Dr. Caitrin’s. It was the sort of satisfying finish that a book ought to have. Continue reading
Cynara’s finger pointed without hesitation. “Her. Channing.” She looked a little startled at her finger, then back at Abaddon, then back at the girl in question. “Her,” she repeated. She was more firm this time. “I —” She turned away from him, looking at Zita and Howard and Leo. Her friends.
“Thanks. I will owe you one, when we are our own people.” He couldn’t promise, but he imitated the phrasing he’d heard from people who could.
She wasn’t listening anymore, already turned to Howard, but he thought he saw Zita nod in approval at him.
Then he was moving on, hurrying, stepping up until Channing could see him. Continue reading
Tuesday, April 24, 2001
Cya had learned that when Aviv did that, it seemed to mean he was buying her and Leo a little private time. Cya looked at what she was cooking and moved things to the slow cooker. It could sit indefinitely that way, and she could think about more important things than food, like her friends.
“I was wondering if I could borrow Cynara for a bit.”
Wait, what? She continued moving through the paces of putting the food in the cooker, but she had to struggle to keep her ears from pointing right at Aviv. Even if nobody could see her ears, they were still a dead giveaway.
“Borrow her? What do you want her for?” Dysmas sounded – he sounded bored. She struggled with the stab of indignation and hurt. She bored him, did she? He didn’t even really care what someone else wanted with her. Continue reading
Monday, April 9, 2001
It had been a crazy idea.
Of course it had been a crazy idea: it had been Leo’s, and he hadn’t been sane since –
since, well, Eriko. But Leo had had an idea, and Cya had gone along with it just because it was Leo wanting to do something.
And because if it succeeded, she would find a way to be clear of this place if she had to cut it out of her mind with a scalpel, and then she could do the same for her friends, and THEN she could find a way to fix what had been done to Leo if she had to practice on every since insane person in America first. Continue reading
Friday, March 23, 2001
Leo was back.
No. No, someone in Leo’s body was back.
Someone with Leo’s hair and Leo’s sparks and Leo’s little spikes of antlers was in the suite. He Belonged to Aviv, now, because — as Cya understood it, as Zita had explained — Sheba had passed him on to Lydia, because Sheba had never intended to Keep him, just to get him away from Eriko.
Lydia’s boyfriend had been Kept with Aviv, which was generally understood to be something like a bond. And from what she’d heard — it was amazing what people would say around you if you closed down enough that they forgot you were a person — about why Lydia… why she gave him to Aviv, Cya got the feeling that Leo had no intention of ever being a good Kept again. Except, looking at him, she wasn’t always sure that he had any volition left for intention. Continue reading
Friday, March 9, 2001
There was this moment when they parted way after classes that Cya tried not to think about anymore.
She gave Howard a nice hug and smiled warmly at Zita, gave Leo a smile that he managed to respond to, and very slowly turned towards their – towards Dysmas’ suite.
She could hear them talking for a few minutes. She didn’t so much track the conversation as she held on to the sound of their words. She could feel it almost like a touch. Continue reading
Monday, February 19, 2001
Cya felt like, if she held herself perfectly straight and perfectly still, nothing would fall off. Otherwise, she was afraid, she was going to shatter into a thousand pieces.
She kissed Dysmas and made the appropriate wiggle as he grabbed her butt with both hands and pulled her in towards him, then headed off to class, not straightening her skirt until she was out of sight. Nobody tried to hit on her; Alexander looked over at her with sad eyes and she pretended she couldn’t see. Save your sadness for someone who needs it. Continue reading
Wednesday, February 14, 2001
Cynara sat in the living room of Dysmas’ crew’s suite. It was Valentine’s day; Dysmas had given her two wrist cuffs that matched the collar around her neck, delicate and silver. She’d smiled and thanked him sweetly and considered exactly how useful they would be if transmuted into a knife.
At least they hadn’t been hawthorn. She was pretty sure he couldn’t buy those in the store, and so far, all of her attempts to work with the wood in question had been lop-sided and awful. Rowan and hawthorn took time and more energy to Work, Professor Valerian had told her, and then, with arched eyebrows, asked why she needed them. Continue reading